{"id":15127,"date":"2017-11-21T09:16:08","date_gmt":"2017-11-21T14:16:08","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/joemckeever.com\/wp\/?p=15127"},"modified":"2017-11-21T09:16:23","modified_gmt":"2017-11-21T14:16:23","slug":"the-facebook-syndrome-alive-and-well-in-our-churches","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/joemckeever.com\/wp\/the-facebook-syndrome-alive-and-well-in-our-churches\/","title":{"rendered":"The Facebook Syndrome: Alive and well in our churches"},"content":{"rendered":"

“Encourage one another and build each other up” (I Thessalonians 5:11).<\/strong><\/p>\n

Bertha was\u00a0in her mid-forties. \u00a0She and husband Gary had gone to pastor in\u00a0central Florida, and the women of their neighborhood had given a welcoming tea for her at a local upscale restaurant.\u00a0 There were perhaps 20 or 30 in attendance.\u00a0 It was an impressive event.<\/p>\n

Throughout the afternoon, an elderly lady across the table kept staring at Bertha.\u00a0\u00a0Finally, in her quavering voice, the\u00a0woman\u00a0said,\u00a0“My dear.\u00a0 You are soooo lovely!”<\/p>\n

Bertha smiled and thanked her.<\/p>\n

A short time afterwards, Bertha\u00a0was walking home from the tea with one of the women who was a neighbor.\u00a0 The\u00a0woman said, “Oh, by the way, the older woman who\u00a0told you you’re so lovely, she is actually almost blind.\u00a0\u00a0I thought you would want to know.”<\/p>\n

Bertha has no memory of how she responded to that.\u00a0 My own opinion is there is no answer to it.\u00a0 It’s a show-stopper.<\/p>\n

Why,\u00a0we wonder, did\u00a0the neighbor\u00a0feel it important to shoot down the\u00a0older lady’s compliment?\u00a0 What kind of mentality prompts one to do such a thing?\u00a0 Why couldn’t she be content with the pastor’s wife receiving a compliment?\u00a0 (And a fitting compliment at that.\u00a0 Bertha is my bride now of nearly 11 months, and people still remark on her loveliness.)<\/p>\n

Facebook users see it all the time.<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

Someone will post a statement on their FB page and\u00a0within minutes a “friend”\u00a0will\u00a0oppose it.\u00a0 Or point out the downside of it.\u00a0 Or question it. \u00a0Say how that doesn’t tell the whole story.\u00a0 Or deny it\u00a0outright and wonder how anyone could be so crass as to believe that.<\/p>\n

Someone will praise their team for winning last night’s game.\u00a0 Immediately a FB “friend”\u00a0will\u00a0comment that\u00a0your team\u00a0did not win so much as the other team lost it by their ineptitude.\u00a0Or they will blame the loss on\u00a0poor coaching. The referees.\u00a0 Lack of fan support.<\/p>\n

And you must not dare try to say something sane and reasonable about a controversial issue.\u00a0 You may as well draw a target upon your back.\u00a0 Do it and get ready to take the slings and arrows.<\/p>\n

What I’m calling “the Facebook Syndrome” is the tendency of people to criticize a positive statement, to find fault with one’s presentation, to never allow someone to feel good about the job they just did.<\/p>\n

That is the very thing that keeps a lot of good-thinking people away from social media.\u00a0 It attracts the mentally ill, the eccentrics, the devil’s advocates, the naysayers.\u00a0 They’re never content to let a compliment go unchallenged, a fact go unexamined, a joy go uncriticized.<\/p>\n

It does get wearisome.\u00a0\u00a0As one who does a great deal of stuff on Facebook, some of it cutting edge and controversial on purpose, I see this all the time.\u00a0 My friends tease that I’m a pot-stirrer, always trying to rock the boat.\u00a0 Far from it, in fact.\u00a0 I grieve at the arguing back and forth that quickly erupts when all I’ve tried to do is say something clear and helpful.<\/p>\n

Why do people do this?\u00a0 They’re all over social media.<\/p>\n

I wouldn’t be at all surprised if they’re the same people who do this at church.\u00a0 They cannot leave well enough alone, dare not leave a positive blessing to stand on its own, and will not let anyone receive an unadulterated (i.e., pure, not watered down) compliment.\u00a0 They have to tell you “the other side,” the facts of life, how things are in the real world.<\/p>\n

It gets wearisome.\u00a0 Ask any minister.<\/strong><\/p>\n

“I love my pastor’s preaching.”\u00a0 Oh really?\u00a0 Well, you’re the first I’ve heard say that!<\/p>\n

“I love my pastor’s preaching.”\u00a0 I’m glad you do.\u00a0 No one in my family does.<\/p>\n

“I love my pastor’s preaching.”\u00a0 Ha.\u00a0 Do you remember that sermon on tithing he preached last month?\u00a0 My husband still hasn’t forgiven him for that!<\/p>\n

“I love my pastor’s preaching.”\u00a0 Great. Why don’t you write him a note and say so.\u00a0 He sure gets a lot of the negative remarks.\u00a0 And better yet, tell everyone you know!<\/p>\n

John Bisagno pastored the great First Baptist Church of Houston, TX for many years and was mightily used of God there.\u00a0 In fact, Brother John was one of the first mega-church pastors who really took our denomination–if not Christendom–by storm.\u00a0 For a number of years, he was baptizing a thousand people a year.\u00a0 A spell-binding preacher, he was on the program of denominational conventions and meetings of all types, easily the most popular and most beloved of his generation.\u00a0 But\u00a0while preaching\u00a0in our church in the late 1980s, he told me something that I found amazing.<\/p>\n

“I have a deacon who has opposed every thing we have done in our church.\u00a0 Every single thing.”<\/p>\n

Imagine that.<\/p>\n

Now, knowing this preacher, I figured he would have made short work of that gentleman and shown him the door.\u00a0He could have. But he didn’t. I never asked why.\u00a0 For our purposes here, I’m simply pointing out that the naysayer was there, on the job, always with a ‘no’ vote.\u00a0 He will answer to God for that.<\/p>\n

I\u00a0can imagine\u00a0what the man\u00a0might say in his own defense.\u00a0 Almost every pastor has heard it.<\/p>\n

“I just felt like someone should be the devil’s advocate.”<\/em><\/p>\n

In a church of the Lord Jesus Christ, a member thinks the devil needs a voice.\u00a0 An advocate.\u00a0 A lawyer.\u00a0 A personal representative.\u00a0 To be heard.<\/p>\n

I’d give a quarter to know what the Lord will say to such a person at Judgement.\u00a0 And will not venture to suggest what that might be, other than to imagine it has to do with “you like him so much, go spend eternity with the devil”.<\/p>\n

Discouragement: A sin of the first order<\/strong><\/p>\n

In the Old Testament, warriors who discouraged their colleagues were counted as traitors and dealt with accordingly.<\/p>\n

–“Why are you discouraging the sons of Israel so that they did not go into the land which the Lord had given them?” (See Numbers 32:6ff.)<\/p>\n

–It was the unbelieving enemies who discouraged Israel in the post-exile days.\u00a0 See Ezra 5:3 and Nehemiah 4.<\/p>\n

–Other texts are I Samuel 30:6 and I Kings 19.<\/p>\n

–In Deuteronomy 20:8, Moses addresses the army. “Whoever is fearful and fainthearted among you may go home, lest you infect everyone around you with that fatal disease.” (Okay, my own spin on what he said.)<\/p>\n

–Isaiah 8:12\u00a0 “Do not fear what they fear. Fear God.”<\/p>\n

How does one discourage others around him?\u00a0 The list is endless…<\/strong><\/p>\n

–“Yes, but….”<\/p>\n

–“I know you mean well, pastor, but Mrs. So-and-So is against it, and you know her family built this church.”<\/p>\n

–“We dare not go forward without the money in the bank, preacher.\u00a0 Faith is good and all that righteous stuff, but this is the real world.”<\/p>\n

–“You’ve set the goal too high.\u00a0 When we don’t meet it, the people will be disappointed.\u00a0 Let’s be reasonable.”<\/p>\n

–“Let’s keep the pastor’s salary low.\u00a0 It will keep him humble and on his knees before the Lord.”<\/p>\n

–“Let’s not get too bold here.\u00a0 We tried that very thing 25 years ago and it didn’t work.”<\/p>\n

Why do naysayers do what they do?\u00a0 <\/strong><\/p>\n

    \n
  1. They’re hurting.<\/strong><\/em>\u00a0\u00a0(Let’s start\u00a0by being charitable and assuming the best.) \u00a0I once had a deacon who was against everything.\u00a0 A friend told me after one particularly difficult session with the man, “Preacher, don’t let Jack bother you.\u00a0 I once served on the city council with him and he opposed everything there.\u00a0 I said, ‘Jack, tell me something you’re for.’\u00a0 He looked at me like, ‘Huh?” I said, ‘You’re against everything. Tell me what you’re for.’ And he couldn’t think of a thing.”\u00a0 Then one day I visited in Jack’s home and discovered the man had severe back problems and lived with chronic pain.\u00a0 I never worried about his nay-saying after that.\u00a0 My heart went out to the man.<\/li>\n
  2. Bad mental health<\/strong><\/em>.\u00a0 They simply cannot go to sleep at night knowing someone is happy, the church is united, and the pastor is pleased with everything.\u00a0 Some missing cog in their machinery wants to make sure everyone is as miserable as they are.\u00a0 Whether they are saved or not we will leave with the Father.<\/li>\n
  3. Some are unsaved.\u00a0<\/strong> They simply are unbelievers.\u00a0 We recall how our Lord said the persecutors of His followers would do their work for one huge reason: “They do not know the One who sent me” (John 15:21).\u00a0 Here are\u00a0passages that speak to this…<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    –“Not all have faith.”\u00a0 (2 Thessalonians 3:2)<\/p>\n

    –“The natural man does not\u00a0accept the things of the Spirit of God for they are foolishness to him.\u00a0 Neither can he understand them, for they are spiritually appraised.”\u00a0 (I Corinthians 2:14).<\/p>\n

    –When the Israelites left Egypt, they were not alone.\u00a0 Fleeing the oppression of the Pharaoh with them was a large contingent of other slaves, people from all backgrounds and nationalities who simply wanted to be free.\u00a0(See Exodus 12:38 and Numbers 11:4)<\/p>\n

    Called “the rabble” in some translations, they became a thorn in the flesh to Moses.\u00a0 Much of the “murmuring” of the crowd during the wilderness wanderings was begun by these people who had no faith and yet no hesitation in speaking up.\u00a0 Their doubts and fears were contagious and soon infected the congregation.\u00a0 Their descendants are in every church in the land, and can be heard when any congregation decides to do something by faith.\u00a0 They scream to high heaven.\u00a0 Whoever heard of such a thing?\u00a0 Where will we get the money to do that?\u00a0 What will the outside world say?\u00a0 The church should be run as a business. Our pastor has his head in the clouds.<\/p>\n

    Final word: I would hate to be the one who said, “Why was this perfume not sold for 300 denarii and given to poor people?” (John 12:5)\u00a0 Judas was the ultimate naysayer, the voice of no-faith, the devil’s advocate.<\/p>\n

    Lord, help me to speak faith at all times.\u00a0 To encourage Thy people.\u00a0 To comfort the hurting.\u00a0 To give strength to the weak.\u00a0 For Jesus’ sake. Amen.<\/strong> <\/em><\/p>\n

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     <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    “Encourage one another and build each other up” (I Thessalonians 5:11). Bertha was\u00a0in her mid-forties. \u00a0She and husband Gary had gone to pastor in\u00a0central Florida, and the women of their neighborhood had given a welcoming tea for her at a … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[51,5],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-15127","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-healthy-church","category-pastors"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/joemckeever.com\/wp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15127","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/joemckeever.com\/wp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/joemckeever.com\/wp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/joemckeever.com\/wp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/joemckeever.com\/wp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=15127"}],"version-history":[{"count":23,"href":"https:\/\/joemckeever.com\/wp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15127\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":15175,"href":"https:\/\/joemckeever.com\/wp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15127\/revisions\/15175"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/joemckeever.com\/wp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=15127"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/joemckeever.com\/wp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=15127"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/joemckeever.com\/wp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=15127"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}