The headline from an online preacher magazines says a pastor fired because of his alcoholism is bitter at his mistreatment by that congregation\u2019s leaders.\u00a0 Not good.<\/p>\n
I\u2019ll not be reading that article, thank you.\u00a0 But a lot of people will.\u00a0 Looks to me like he deserved what he got.\u00a0 But then, I\u2019m neither his judge nor their advisor.\u00a0 But when a fired preacher walks away bitter, that does concern me.<\/p>\n
No one deserves to pastor the Lord\u2019s church.\u00a0 No degrees on the wall, no glowing resume, no recommendations from the denomination entitle you to a church to pastor.<\/p>\n
It’s a privilege.\u00a0 A call from Heaven.<\/p>\n
The bitterness feels like this guy no longer trusts the Lord.\u00a0 I suggest he read Acts 16 again, and remind himself how God can use setbacks and what appears to be defeats for His purposes.\u00a0 But to do that, he will be needing trusting servants who are willing to take their lumps without complaining, to quieten their spirits, and to sing at midnight (Acts 16:25).<\/p>\n
That God would allow any of us to preach to His people year after year, declaring Heaven\u2019s message to the redeemed,\u00a0without giving us what we truly deserve\u2013the fires of hell come to mind, frankly\u2013shows Him to be a God of grace.\u00a0 Why don\u2019t we see that?<\/p>\n
Whenever I hear a Christian talking about not getting what he deserved, I run in the opposite direction, lest the Father suddenly decide to give the fellow what he\u2019s asking for!<\/p>\n
So, you were fired.\u00a0 Okay.\u00a0 Can we talk?<\/em><\/p>\n <\/p>\n Call it whatever you will.\u00a0 Perhaps they dressed up the terminology and told the congregation you were taking an extended leave, with pay for three months.\u00a0 But you weren\u2019t coming back.\u00a0 Or, you were taking a well-needed sabbatical for rest and study. But you weren\u2019t coming back.\u00a0 Or you were going to the \u201cwilderness\u201d for some retraining and redirection for your ministry. But you weren\u2019t coming back.<\/p>\n You will hold your head up and go forward and look to the Lord who called you into this work in the first place, asking Him\u00a0to do with it whatever He has chosen.<\/p>\n Let’s repeat that–<\/p>\n Hold your head up!\u00a0 Look to the Lord.\u00a0 Give this whole business to Him.\u00a0 And keep on doing that until no trace of resentment can be found on your person.\u00a0 Even if it takes years!<\/em><\/p>\n Of course it\u2019s hard.\u00a0 It\u2019s very hard.<\/p>\n The simple fact is, it’s so hard most people won\u2019t be able to pull it off.\u00a0 They will grasp their hurt to themselves like a prized possession and refuse to give it up.\u00a0 Only those who truly trust the Savior can keep their eyes on Him, keep abiding in Him, and keep on trusting and loving and giving.<\/p>\n The arm of flesh will fail you; you dare not trust your own. Put on the gospel armor\u2026<\/em>.<\/p>\n What other things can the ousted pastor do, now that his status with the church is no longer in doubt?<\/p>\n I. While you are still on the scene\u2026.<\/strong><\/p>\n \u2013First, try not to let it catch you unprepared.<\/strong>\u00a0 You should have seen this separation coming.\u00a0 And if you did, even if you fought it and prayed against it happening, you surely must have given some thought on what you would do if the church (or an official body representing the church) asked you to leave.<\/p>\n Among other things, this means you will have prepared your family for this eventuality.\u00a0 You and your spouse will have given thought to where you would live and what you would do for a job until something opened up in ministry.<\/p>\n \u2013Second, try to work out as much severance as you can<\/strong>.\u00a0 I talked with a pastor who said the following Sunday would be his last at that church, the work of a little group of leaders.\u00a0 Would there be severance? He had no idea.\u00a0 I suggested he get his local denominational leader involved, asking him to intercede.\u00a0 He needs a friend.<\/p>\n As a rule, the longer you stay at a church, the more the severance when you leave.\u00a0 However, for anything less than five years, be thankful if you get as much as three months.<\/p>\n A veteran pastor in the area or a denominational leader might be willing to call the chair of the official group and discreetly inquire about the severance, even to the point of making suggestions. Most lay leaders will have no experience in this and will appreciate the assistance.<\/p>\n \u2013Third, as soon as you know this is going to happen and nothing can stop it, check with one of your mentors<\/strong> (or a denominational friend) and see what advice\/counsel they have as you negotiate your departure.\u00a0 Will the church move you?\u00a0 Will they take care of your health insurance for the period of the severance?\u00a0 That sort of thing.\u00a0 And, what kind of reference will they give you when the next church comes calling?<\/p>\n \u2013Fourth, start a journal.\u00a0<\/strong> Get a wordless book and sit on the back porch with a cup of coffee and start writing. Put the date at the top of page 1, and say what has happened, what you are doing today, and what you hope to do.\u00a0 Write out a brief prayer.\u00a0 And tomorrow, do the same.\u00a0 Keep it up as long as you wish. Even if it means repeating some events, certain conversations.\u00a0 It’s good therapy and may end up being a needed record.\u00a0 Doing this will help you think matters through, too.\u00a0 I know this from experience.<\/p>\n \u2013Fifth, be kind to everyone.\u00a0<\/strong>\u00a0If you have been mistreated and the ousting is unfair, your flesh will want to strike out and make sure the congregation knows who did this to you.\u00a0 And, if the Holy Spirit leads you to share that information with the church, or a portion of the congregation, you will do that.\u00a0 But you will want to be kind and Christlike in everything you do and say.<\/p>\n I know of a young pastor who left a church of his own volition, but who used his\u00a0last sermon to vent his frustrations and anger.\u00a0 Twenty years later, that final tirade is the only thing those people remember about this good man\u2019s ministry there.<\/p>\n \u2013Sixth, tell a few ministry friends<\/strong>.\u00a0 As soon as you knew you were leaving, you should have set up a network of colleagues in the ministry and informed them. You needed their prayers, but you also wanted them to a) know what was happening and b) be prepared to recommend you to another church.<\/p>\n II. Then, after you have left that church\u2026<\/strong><\/p>\n \u2013One.\u00a0 Do something about your plans.<\/strong> Do not assume you will be back in the pulpit of another church by the time your severance ends.\u00a0 Most unemployed pastors find it takes six months or more to do this.\u00a0 In my case, it was a full year. So, be planning what you will do to put groceries on the table and to pay the mortgage.<\/p>\n Nothing frightens the wife of an unemployed pastor more than his sitting around the house moping, sending out resumes, waiting by the phone, and nothing happening. Likewise, nothing fuels the anger and frustration in the unemployed minister more than the phone never ringing.\u00a0 So, do something. Your wounded self esteem will jump a mile when you discover you can earn a living doing something other than preaching.<\/p>\n \u2013Two.\u00a0 Find a good counselor<\/strong>\u00a0and make periodic visits.\u00a0 No holds barred, tell what happened and let it all hang out.\u00a0 Then, leave the anger there.<\/p>\n \u2013Three.\u00a0 Keep up with your journal. <\/strong>\u00a0Watch out for the anger, for depression, for the tendency to blame others for what happened to you.\u00a0 Write down your prayer for the day, as well as insights from Scripture that blessed you this morning.<\/p>\n \u2013Four.\u00a0 Maintain a good fitness program.<\/strong>\u00a0 And if you don\u2019t have one, get one.\u00a0 At the very least, find a good walking track in a park somewhere and visit it daily.\u00a0 A couple of miles should take 30 minutes.\u00a0 The health benefit will be enormous and you’ll find this an excellent time to think about matters and talk to the Father.<\/p>\n \u2013Five. Do not write anything publicly about your experience<\/strong> in that church for a number of years.\u00a0 For the moment, your journal should be all the writing you do about that sad experience. The day may come\u2013as it did for me a full eleven years later\u2013when you can write about it dispassionately in a way to help others going through the same trial.<\/p>\n If you were indeed treated unfairly, remember the old dictum that \u201cthe best revenge is living well.\u201d\u00a0 Show that church and the world\u2013and most importantly, yourself and your spouse\u2013that you are whole and healthy and a survivor.\u00a0 No venom, no anger, no revenge.\u00a0 Determine to love and bless and help.\u00a0 Let the Lord deal with the previous church.\u00a0 From all I know, He will.\u00a0 Keep in mind that you were not guiltless in that situation.\u00a0 No problems are all completely one-sided.<\/p>\n \u2013Six. Accept every preaching\/teaching opportunity that comes along<\/strong>, whether it\u2019s teaching a Sunday School class, speaking in the nursing home, or filling in for a friend at the jail service.\u00a0 Resist the temptation to turn down small invitations in order to be available when a more attractive one arrives.\u00a0 The best indication that you are ready to return to the pastorate is that you are actively serving the Lord now in every way you can.<\/p>\n Don\u2019t miss that last statement.\u00a0 When you are dismissed from a church, if you are normal you will announce that \u201cI\u2019m just fine and I\u2019m ready for the Lord to send me to my next assignment.\u201d\u00a0 Chances are, that\u2019s wrong.\u00a0 There is a good chance you are hurting inside and need some healing before you can be trusted to handle with care the next family of believers the Lord has for you.<\/p>\n You need healing.\u00a0 And for that, you need to do number seven perhaps most of all.<\/p>\n \u2014Seven.\u00a0 Join a church and get active.<\/strong>\u00a0Tithe your income and sit in the pew and pray for your new pastor.\u00a0 Guard against the tendency to judge his sermons and leadership.\u00a0 Never ever let anyone, even your spouse, hear you say, \u201cIf I were pastor of this church\u2026.\u201d<\/p>\n Someone reading this may fault it for my failure to mention \u201cprayer.\u201d\u00a0 Actually, I\u2019m assuming you are praying constantly, in everything, throughout the day.<\/p>\n The day will come when you will be in another church, more than likely smaller than your previous pastorate.\u00a0 That\u2019s just how these things work, and to expect to land in a larger situation than the one from which you were terminated is unrealistic. (I actually know a couple of instances where that did happen.\u00a0 But those are the exceptions.)\u00a0 And when you get there\u2026<\/p>\n III. Then, in your new church\u2026<\/strong><\/p>\n \u2013Stay close to the Lord and your spouse.\u00a0 That will require some quality time every day for both.<\/p>\n \u2013Remember how it felt when you were suddenly unemployed.\u00a0 So when you hear of a pastor who has been dismissed, even with just cause, reach out to him.\u00a0 You have \u201cbeen there and have the t-shirt to prove it.\u201d<\/p>\n God said to Israel, \u201cWhen you get into the Promised Land and things are going well for you, be kind to the foreigner in your midst.\u00a0 You were once foreigners in Egypt, so you know how it feels.\u201d (The gist of several statements in Leviticus 19.)<\/p>\n \u2013Do not rejoice\u00a0when you hear\u00a0your old church is having problems.\u00a0 Pray for them.\u00a0 Pray for the new pastor.\u00a0 Leave them with the Lord.<\/p>\n \u2013From time to time, reflect on your time in that previous church and ask yourself two questions:\u00a0 a) What did I do wrong?\u00a0 and b) What do I wish now I had done?\u00a0 Write about those in your journal.\u00a0 And of course, keep the journal to yourself.\u00a0 This is not for publication.\u00a0 Not yet, at any rate.\u00a0 The day may come.<\/p>\n \u2013Look for signs in how you relate to your new church that you are not fully healed.\u00a0 This could show up as impatience or temper or depression. (In my case, it was a dread of every deacons’ meeting.)\u00a0 Watch for the temptation to preach to your people what you wish you had said to the last congregation.<\/p>\n \u2013Listen to your wife, both to her words and to her heart.\u00a0 She\u00a0sees the signs\u00a0indicating whether you are healthy in mind and body and soul, and will be the first to inform you.\u00a0 At the first sign of trouble, return to the counselor and talk it out.\u00a0 Do not argue or justify yourself.<\/p>\n You will get past this.\u00a0 You will be healthy and whole and have a great ministry.\u00a0 And, if experience can be trusted, I\u2019d say your next ministry will be different from what you have done before.\u00a0 And better even.<\/p>\n A pastor friend who was ousted from his church is now working as a chaplain with a ministry reaching troubled young people.\u00a0 Another friend who\u00a0 had to leave his church abruptly ended up pastoring in another state a congregation that had just come through a bad split.<\/p>\n God will not waste suffering.\u00a0 He will use this in your life.\u00a0 But to get the full benefits, you must stay close to Him, remain in place where He puts you, and obey all the things you know He wants faithful disciples to do.<\/p>\n Toward the end of their first missionary journey, Paul and Barnabas told the new converts, \u201cThrough much tribulation we enter the kingdom of God\u201d (Acts 14:22).\u00a0 Or, more bluntly, between here and heaven, expect trouble.\u00a0 Hardship is not par for the course; it is the course.<\/p>\n Stay buckled up.\u00a0 Turbulence ahead.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" The headline from an online preacher magazines says a pastor fired because of his alcoholism is bitter at his mistreatment by that congregation\u2019s leaders.\u00a0 Not good. I\u2019ll not be reading that article, thank you.\u00a0 But a lot of people will.\u00a0 … Continue reading