Dottie came to me for counsel.<\/p>\n
I was her pastor and she was battling depression, she said, and had dealt with it for years.<\/p>\n
I listened and realized something vital.<\/p>\n
My wife and Dottie had a lot in common.<\/p>\n
So, after the visit had gone on for a half-hour, I said, “Dottie, there is someone I want you to know.\u00a0 I’d like you and my wife to talk.\u00a0 Now, Margaret is not a trained therapist, although she’s a far better counselor than I.\u00a0 But she knows what you are going through because she’s battled depression, too.”<\/p>\n
She assured me she would be willing to meet with her.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
And, this being in the years before my wife developed several debilitating infirmities, Margaret was glad to invite Dottie over for coffee. And that started a lifelong friendship.<\/p>\n
That was over 20 years ago. Dottie and her husband retired and live in another state now, but I learned later that a few days before God called Margaret to Heaven in January of this year, she and Dottie had chatted on the phone for over an hour.<\/p>\n
Such a simple thing I did all those years ago.\u00a0 But so lifechanging for everyone.<\/p>\n
As far as I can recall, Dottie never again came back to me for counsel.<\/p>\n
She and her husband became some of our best friends and strongest supporters in the church.<\/p>\n
As a general rule, we pastors are not trained counselors who specialize in longterm therapy for troubled church members.\u00a0 Most pastors, I expect, are a lot like me in that I would sit and listen and all the while, be asking the Lord, “Who do I know who can help this one?”\u00a0 Sometimes, the answer would be a trained professional counselor. At other times, a financial counselor.\u00a0 But at other times, I realized this one simply needed an older “mama” in the church.\u00a0 Numerous times, I have matched a troubled younger woman with an older, wiser mature lady and have done them both great favors.<\/p>\n
As I reflect back on it, several of the best friends my wife had in life came to her at my suggestion after they had visited me, seeking counsel from their pastor.<\/p>\n
It’s not necessary to be a great counselor if you know some good resources. Or have a wonderful wife.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Dottie came to me for counsel. I was her pastor and she was battling depression, she said, and had dealt with it for years. I listened and realized something vital. My wife and Dottie had a lot in common. So, … Continue reading