Once in a while we will come across something from the morning news that has nothing in the world to do with preachers or Christians or the church, but which is as good a mirror as one could ever find for us to find our own reflection.

So this morning.

Mackie Shilstone is described in the (New Orleans) Times-Picayune as a “noted sports trainer (who) has been working with tennis star Serena Williams the past 18 months.”

Anyone who has anything to do with professional sports knows his name. He’s a New Orleanian, is often on TV and radio, and is evidently the answer to the prayers of a lot of athletes regarding their conditioning.

Over the last week or so, while the U.S.Open tennis championship has been being played out in New York City, Shilstone has been sending a “postcard” to our newspaper. At least, that’s what the paper calls it. Today’s was the first column of his I’ve seen.

It’s evidently the last one, too, since Serena Williams lost in the semifinals against Kim Clijsters in a profanity-laced tirade that got her fined and provoked an investigation into the possibility of additional penalties.

Okay, enough background. I want you to see a portion of Mackie Shilstone’s column in which he is supposed to be talking about the tennis star, the championship, and the competition. Today would have been a great time for him to give us his take on what Serena did. But nope. She’s paying him the big bucks.

Here’s something of what he said….

“Over my last 27 years of working with more than 3,000 pro athletes, and in every pro sports venue from being in the dugout of the San Francisco Giants in the World Series, the sideline of the Pittsburgh Steelers in Super Bowl IX, to working the corner of championship boxing matches, I must say that being part of Team Serena will go down as a cherished memory.”

One wonders how much Shilstone paid the Times-Picayune for that self-promoting ad?

Mostly I wonder, can we preachers read that and see ourselves in its reflection?

Attend any pastors’ conference in our denomination and before long, someone will rise to bring a message that begins something like this….

“I’m so honored to be here today. I’ve spoken before some of the great audiences in our land. Last week, we did a crusade in Tulsa that packed out the city auditorium three times and we had to go to overflow rooms. Hundreds gave their hearts to Jesus. God did mighty things there. I’ve spoken at the White House, and my speaking schedule is booked solid for the next three years. I’m awed at the blessing of God upon my ministry. But the opportunity to address you today is one of the finest invitations to come my way….”

Uh huh. Sure it is. And your brochures are on the tables in the foyer. (No doubt they describe you as one of the most powerful voices calling for America to return to God. Doubtless, the brochures contain quotes from your friends substantiating this. What you do not say is that you asked them to do that for you.)

Even the lesser known pastors–those not members of the jet set of elite, in-demand and highly-compensated speakers–quickly learn how to play this game.

The pastor of Podunk Church has been invited to bring a message at the annual conference of pastors in his state.

He rises and begins with something like this:

“I don’t know why they would invite a nobody like me to preach to such an illustrious group. I’m in awe just standing at this pulpit. But brethren, God has been blessing this little church of mine out on highway 51 below Podunk. Why, the population of our entire area is only 500, but yesterday morning we had nearly half that number in our worship service.”

He goes on, “It’s such an honor to be their preacher. I tell my wife we wouldn’t ever want to go to any other church. I can’t tell you the number of pastor search committees I’ve turned away just in the last six months. I tell them, ‘God called me and I’m staying until He says otherwise.'” (He gets lots of ‘amens’ at this.)

“Brethren, two years ago, our little church was thinking of closing its doors. The tiny band of discouraged members met to decide whether to shut ‘er down and join a church in town. But then someone told them about me, and they decided to invite me to be their preacher and give it one more try, for Jesus’ sake.”

“Well, sir, God has blessed. In the last year, we have baptized 250 precious souls. We’ve now gone on television throughout metro Podunk and I’ve been interviewed by the religious media wanting to know what our secret is. There’s no secret! Just obey the Lord!” (more amens)

“I was so honored this Spring when the Floraville Theological Seminary awarded me a doctor of divinity degree. Why, I haven’t read three books since high school–and now, a major publisher is considering bringing out a volume of my sermons. A writer was in my office last week wanting the exclusive rights to my story. God is good. Jesus is wonderful.”

The fascinating part of this egocentric mess is that his audience soaks it up and voices their approval in the appropriate places right on demand, just the way he prompts them.

Where is our discernment?

Why do we condone this claptrap and why do we keep inviting such people to fill the schedule for future programs?

Why don’t more pastors, their spouses, and laypeople alike have the gumption to get up and walk out when the speaker does this?

“We don’t want to embarrass him or the people who invited him.”

They need to be embarrassed. They need to be ashamed.

The best thing that could ever happen to such a shallow, self-promoting preacher who tries this on an audience would be to suddenly find himself addressing a roomful of vacant pews.

“Faithful are the wounds of a friend, but deceitful are the kisses of an enemy.” (Proverbs 27:6)

We have a great deal of evidence of the preaching and ministry of the Apostle Paul. Do we see anything even approaching this in the letters and speaking of this greatest of all apostles?

Paul said, “We do not preach ourselves.” (2 Corinthians 4:5)

Well, maybe he doesn’t, but plenty of the rest of our brethren do.

In fact, anyone interested in seeing the approach Paul used when put in a perfect situation to have sprung his considerable resume on his audience would do well to read 2 Corinthians 11:21-30 where he seeks to justify his apostleship.

A lesser man would have pulled out his degrees and pointed to his accomplishments, bragging of the churches he has started, the crowds he has addressed and the converts he has made.

I mean, Paul could have said, “Furthermore, God has used me to write most of the New Testament!!” (Betcha none of us can say that!)

Paul does the opposite. He shows them his scars.

“…imprisonments, beaten times without number, often in danger of death. Five times I received from the Jews 39 lashes. Three times I was beaten with rods, once I was stoned, three times I was ship-wrecked, a night and a day I have spent in the deep….”

You get the idea.

This is what I call a reverse resume’. To establish his authenticity as a disciple of Jesus and an apostle called by God, Paul tells of the hardships he has withstood, the beatings and jailings, the attacks and the struggles.

We pause to ask a question of all pastor search committees looking for the next shepherd for your congregation: instead of asking the candidate about all his degrees and accomplishments, what if you asked to see his scars?

God forgive us for losing our way. We have so forgotten what it means to be a humble follower of the Man of Galilee who “came not to be ministered unto but to minister.”

We understand so little of what He meant when He said, “Whoever would be great among you, let him be your servant.”

Forgive us, Lord.

And the next time we stand to address an audience small or great and we are tempted to tell them of the books we have written, the awards we have received, the great church we now serve, and the celebrities who look to us for guidance, please Lord–let all the alarms and whistles go off inside us.

Stop us before we do that again.

For Jesus’ sake.