How to give a commencement address they will remember

I’ve been watching commencement addresses on C-Span.

It’s not as boring as you might think.

They cut out the introductions and tell you in advance “this lasts 15 minutes” or whatever.

It’s highly educational, particularly for those of us who (ahem) make our living speaking in public.

I’ve heard governors, congressmen and congresswomen, CEOs of big companies, and entrepreneurs, all donning those medieval costumes, some with rather ridiculous soft mortarboards of strange colors, and all trying to say something life-changing to an audience that just wants to get this over with and get in out of the hot sun.

A challenging situation for any speaker, I’d say. .

Some have been entertaining and all have had a certain uplifting quality to them.

The speakers take these invitations seriously, I’m glad to say. Either that, or C-Span refuses to air the ones that bombed.

Anyway, based on my television-watching of the past few days, I’ve decided on the principles of a great commencement address and would like to share them with you.

But first, before you rise to speak, come out of the hat.  The mortarboard (or whatever the soft ones are called) look ridiculous on everyone, particularly those of us unaccustomed to wearing them.

All right. My 10 points on how to make a memorable commencement address…

1) Be brief. 15 minutes is great. 12 minutes is perfect. 20 minutes is too long.

2) Get to it.  Don’t mess around with reminiscences of “When I was a student here” or flattery like “I’d like to thank Dean Tankersley for coming to my son’s ball game” or silliness like “I  still owe a library fine.”

You were invited to give a speech. Give it.

3) Simplify.  Do not try to pack too much into your allotted time. Granted, you’ll never be asked back to do this again, but little is much if wisdom is in it.  Go for one or two or three major points, but not fifteen.

4) Be funny, but only if you can do it well.

The way to tell is by trying out your stories on a) your spouse, b) your children (who are almost duty-bound not to laugh, but still, give ’em a try) and c) some friends who agree to tell you the truth.  Tell your funny story in the car to the Lord.  You will know whether His Spirit is telling your spirit to keep it in.

Never ever attempt to use humor before such an august crowd that you have not test-driven numerous times before others.

5) Personal stories are best.  This happened to me. Someone told me this. I saw this happen.

In almost no case do you want to tell a story you heard or read or remember from somewhere.  If it’s old, it’s probably dog-eared and well-used and therefore worthless.  Never forget that the people sitting before you are members of the most techno-savvy generation ever, so assume any old story has been around the cyber-world a few hundred times. Dump it.

6) Self-deprecating stories will get the undivided attention of your audience. Here’s one I loved….

Massachusetts Congressman Joe Kennedy, grandson of former Attorney General Robert F. Kennedy, spoke at the graduation of the University of Virginia Law School, the institution where he himself had graduated a few years back, as well as his grandfather and several uncles.  He told of his first day in law school.

The professor called his name first thing.  “Mr. Kennedy, give us the meaning of ____.”  (He said the word, but it was unfamiliar and I missed it.)

Kennedy: “I don’t know.”

Professor: “Did you do your assigned reading?”

Kennedy: “Yes.”

Professor: “That word is the first word of the first chapter.”

Kennedy: “I know. I circled it because I didn’t know the meaning.”

Professor: “Mr. Kennedy, do you own a dictionary?”

Kennedy: “I haven’t had time to buy one.”

Professor: “Is there anyone in this class who can help Mr. Kennedy and tell him the meaning of this word?”

Every hand in the class went up.  (laughter)

That was Congressman Kennedy’s welcome to UVA Law School, he said.

The crowd thoroughly enjoyed it and bonded with him for the rest of his message.

There’s something about a story of how we did something human (did not look up a word) and ended up looking more foolish (being embarrassed in front of the class) that endears the speaker to the audience, all of whom have done similar things at one time or the other.

In fact, it’s worth humiliating yourself in front of a class if it means you walk out with a great story which will make some future commencement speech memorable.

7) Use one great verse of Scripture.

This is not the time or place for a long scripture. You’re going for something the audience will get, will appreciate, and can remember. For that, it needs to be short and striking.

Some possibilities might include:

–Luke 2:40 “Jesus increased in wisdom and in stature, and in favor with God and with man” (on the subject of continuous lifelong growth);

–Job 4:4 “Your words have helped the tottering to stand, and you have strengthened feeble knees” (about the power of speech);

–Proverbs 27:17 “As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another” (the importance of having great people around you);

–Matthew 25:40 “To the extent you did it to one of the least of these brethren of mine, you did it to me” (God takes personally even the little things we do for the needy).

8) Lower your expectations about the response.

They will say they enjoyed your speech. Smile and thank them.  But the real worth of your address will not be known for months or even years.  That’s when members of your audience will find themselves recalling a line you spoke–or even a phrase–which turned out to be pure gold for them.  When that happens, two things are true: 1) You were a success and 2) you will never know it.

So, you do this strictly in the faith that God wants you to (if He doesn’t, decline please) and that the payoff will be a long time in coming.

Many years ago, my friend James Richardson, Baptist preacher par excellence and my beloved mentor, was invited to speak at the graduation ceremonies of our New Orleans Baptist Theological Seminary. As he stood in the processional ready to march inside, President Leo Eddleman handed him an envelope which James slipped inside his Bible and opened later.

Inside was an expense check and a letter from the president. “Thank you for one of the most inspiring messages this seminary has ever heard.”

I hope your inviter will be as pleased with your message. And as confident you will hit it out of the park as was President Eddleman.

9) Do not look at the video for a few weeks. If you make the mistake of rushing home to plop the DVD into the player, expect to hate your performance.  Best to leave it alone until you recover and can watch it dispassionately, as though you’re watching someone else for the first time. Even so, whether you love what you did or hate it, you are not the judge of your speech (or anything else).

10) Jot down notes on what you wish you’d done differently and hope to get right next time. 

My guess is there won’t be a next time. Most of us get invited for these things maybe once in a long lifetime. But if you are invited twice or even more, you’ve beaten the odds.

Have fun.  And make it fun for everyone else. After all, this is their day and not yours. Try not to interfere with their joy too much.

 

 

2 thoughts on “How to give a commencement address they will remember

  1. It has always amazed me that if the politician is the commencement speaker that is the only time of the year the politician will make any attempt whatsoever to address anyone younger than 40. However it would behoove the preacher our politician who speaks at a commencement to pay attention to the younger generation who are sitting there because they are the ones who will vote for him or her in some form or fashion, pay his or her salary, and can vote him or her right out of office.

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