Dear Lord,

I have been a far poorer Christian than You wanted or I intended.  But I am so glad to be a member of the family of Christ, to be saved and to know it as well as I can know anything.

I am honored to be the brother of the rest of Thy redeemed.

I have been a poor example of a preacher for these many years and have not blushed (the way I should) when someone who barely knows me lauds my wonderful Christian life. Nevertheless, I’m so honored to be a pastor and preacher.

I am a sinner and not only in my pre-Christian life. I’ve sinned enough since becoming a believer to disgust my Lord, embarrass my parents, and disqualify me from ever doing anything in the church.  Yet, I love the assurance that my sins were dealt with on Calvary and each day, He forgives me.

If my post-salvation sins had not been dealt with on Calvary along with all the others, I’d be in a heap of trouble.

Furthermore, I have at times proven myself a hypocrite by sounding forth on themes which I have failed to live up to time and again.  I grieve sometimes when an online magazine runs an article from this website where I have expounded on some Kingdom-related subject as though I knew what I was talking about. I am so unqualified. And yet, “He has made me adequate and sufficient (2 Corinthians 3:5),” so I go forward by faith.

I have told people to do things that I was doing poorly, such as to spend more time praying or studying the Word or giving more generously.  I pray so little, and yet I love to pray. I read my Bible so seldom and yet I love to read it and study it and reflect on its riches.  I give such a small portion of my income and yet what I do give is a delight.

I am so unqualified to be a shepherd of the Lord’s people, so ignorant of God’s word, so carnal and fleshly and unspiritual.

When I hear someone talking about the wonders of Thy grace, I pull up a chair and drink it all in.  That’s my only hope, that “He has not dealt with us according to our sins nor rewarded us according to our iniquity. But as the Heavens are higher than the earth, so great is His lovingkindness toward those who fear Him!” (Psalm 103:10-11)

When I hear someone condemning one who has suddenly been taken while in the very act of disobeying God, I thank God that “Christ receiveth sinful men, even me with all my sin.”

We had a funeral this week. The young man had been watching a football game when he suddenly fell from the second floor balcony onto the pavement below, fatally injuring himself.  I sat in church thinking, “He was not good enough to go to Heaven.  He was not bad enough to go to hell.  But fortunately, that has nothing to do with it.”

“Not by works of righteousness but by His mercy He has saved us” (Titus 3:5).

When I die and my pastor and members of our family file into church to say things about me, let them not leave even a shadow of a doubt in anyone’s mind that “Joe (Dad, Grandpa) went to heaven because he preached the gospel over half a century” or did all those other things. Not because of the money I’ve given over a long lifetime, or the thousands of people I’ve sketched “for Jesus’ sake,” or anything else.

When you get to Heaven, if you find me there–God grant!–we will both have arrived the same way, by the precious blood of Jesus.

Thank you, Lord. Everlastingly, thank you. Praise Your holy Name.