The preacher said something I disagree with. Horrors!

“…they received the Word with great eagerness, examining the Scriptures daily to see whether these things were so” (Acts 17:11).

When I asked where he went to church, the man working on my house said, “I used to go to church across the river.  But the preacher said something I disagreed with.”

It was all I could do not to laugh out loud.

But he was serious.

After giving him a moment to elaborate, which he did not do, I said, “Man, I would hope so.”

He seemed interested.

I said, “Wouldn’t it be terrible to have a preacher who said only the things that I know and taught only what I believe? What would be the point of going to hear him if I already knew what he was going to say? There’s so much more to God than what little I already know!”

Lord, make us teachable.

It’s a mark of maturity to welcome correction, to recognize and appreciate constructive insights to make our lives better. The godliest person comes to church hoping to hear something that blesses, something that corrects him, something that inspires her, whether they had previously known it or agreed with it or not. 

A quick scan of Scripture produces a long lineup of people who heard God calling their name, who made themselves available to Him, and then were told something they didn’t want to hear!

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Pastors: What not to do regarding search committees

We’ve written on this website regarding pastor search committees and how they should be approached by alert pastors.  Perhaps it’s time to say a word on what not to do regarding these church leaders determined to find a new leader for their congregation no matter how many bruised and bleeding ministers they have to leave in their wake.

Just to be safe, you may wish to go ahead and plant your tongue firmly in your cheek.  While the subject is serious, my treatment of it will be only partially so.

Okay. Pastor, you’ve been invited to meet with the search committee from the First Church of Butterfly City, and you’re plenty excited.

You’ve been at your present church a number of years now and have about run out of ideas, patience, and life-savings.  A change would not only be good, it might save your life, your ministry, your marriage or all three.   In fact, your wife might start believing in God once more if you told her He was transferring you to a new church.

Now, pastor, simmer down.  Do not let yourself become too excited….

First, pastor, you must not assume anything.

–Do not assume the Butterfly committee has done its background checks.  It’s completely possible they may begin tonight’s meeting with, “And who are you again? And where are you serving?”  Assume they know very little about you.

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The pastor is bragging on himself…just a little.

I write this mostly tongue in cheek.

Try not to appear to be bragging, pastor.  It’s unbecoming to you.

Having pastored six churches over 42 years and having preached for over 55 years, I know that what I am doing or thinking, fearing or dreading, anticipating or remembering will often work themselves into my preaching.

In fact, it seems to require the strength of Samson to keep these things out of our sermons….

–If a pastor jogs or works out, it is impossible for him not to work that into a sermon at least monthly.  “As I was jogging yesterday morning, I’d just completed my third mile….”

–If a pastor’s child has excelled in athletics or the band or in the classroom, he will find a way to allude to that in a sermon.  It’s what a proud dad does.  “My wife and I are so proud of Jayson who has just received ‘student of the month’ award for the third time.  We were telling our daughter who is working on a Master’s at Johns Hopkins..”

–If the pastor once took a course in Greek and can find his way around a Greek lexicon, he will find it impossible not to mention that in a sermon, “When I was studying Greek” or “My Greek Bible says…”  I say this to our embarrassment.  If a real Greek scholar ever entered the service and challenged us, we would be mortified.

–If a pastor reads through the Bible annually–or has just done it the first time–not saying so in a sermon is asking more than he is able to give.  He just has to say so. “As you know, I read through the Bible annually–and have done so for the last 13 years.”

–If the pastor is an avid golfer or a die-hard for some university’s football team, look for it to show up in sermons from time to time.  He can no more keep that a secret than he can his commitment to Jesus Christ.  “Well, I did it! I hit a hole in one last Tuesday.”  He waits for the congregation to applaud.  Half the people turn to the other half as if to say, “What does that mean?”

–If a pastor owns a doctor’s degree, especially a recent one, it is humanly impossible for him to avoid the occasional reference to “When I was working on my doctorate” or “When I received my doctorate.”  See the notes below, please.

–If a pastor has memorized large portions of Scripture, not only must he let you know it one way or the other, but he will find ways to demonstrate his skill in memorization.  I’m not saying that’s bad, just that this is going to happen.

–If the pastor once had a first-rate high-profile celebrity in his congregation or once met the President of the United States, he will be mentioning it from time to time.  It’s just who he is.

–If the pastor has a long prayer list and spends much time in prayer, the pastor who cannot make a reference to all the time he spends in prayer is a rarity indeed. “One morning recently, my phone rang at 4 am, interrupting me at my time of prayer.  That’s a practice I started in seminary and have tried to keep ever since.”  (Not me. but that’s how it comes across.)

–If the pastor has written a book, he will find a way to mention it.  “When I wrote my book” or “When I was writing my book, my publisher said…” Note that it’s not “the publisher,” but “my publisher,” as though he had his own personal representative in the work of book-making.

Why do pastors do that? 

Human nature, I suppose.

Each of these is an accomplishment out of the ordinary, and we are more than a little pleased with ourselves as a result.

Is our insecurity on display?  Does the pastor’s low self-esteem get a boost when he says, “I once did a wedding attended by movie star Sandra Bullock”?  Probably. We all like to impress.  When I tell that, after a suitable moment for the listener to absorb it, I add, “Miss Bullock was10 years old at the time.  It was her aunt’s wedding, and I never met her.  A cousin told me 20 years later.”  And we all have a good laugh.

One thing for sure.  We preachers have no idea how it sounds when we keep reminding the people that we are just a cut above the ordinary with our doctorates, our association with celebrities, and our health-consciousness.  That’s what drives this blog today, to say we should be discerning about these things.

Well, aren’t all those things good?

I suppose they are.  Pastors are as human as anyone else, and if we give them a bragging reason, you can expect them to drop it into the sermons.  I’m not saying it’s sinful or cause for great embarrassment.

What it is, is a little idiosyncrasy which we preachers would do well to drop. It’s a distraction from our message and provokes a needless reaction in some who sit before us.

Take that doctorate business.  How much better for people to find out accidentally that the preacher owns one of those things than for him to wear it too prominently.  I knew a pastor who had his name–Dr. Pete Nunn— in bold letters on his mailbox.  And his was honorary doctorate, not earned.

The rule of thumb is a good one to remember: “The cheaper the doctorate, the more gaudily the owner wears it.”

Is there a way to say these things from the pulpit and not seem to brag?

Probably not.  But if it’s worth the price–that is, if bragging on your kid is that important to you, even though you know not everyone will appreciate your doing it–then go for it, I reckon.

Here’s what I try to do: Blend humor with a plain-out admission that I’m name-dropping.

From time to time, as I preach in different churches or church banquets–I’m retired and go where I’m invited–I will say, “I hate name-droppers….as I once said to Billy Graham.”  They laugh, and I proceed to tell my story about the great evangelist.

In doing banquets, I’ll sometimes tell the audience, “Now, I have a story about Jerry Clower, Bear Bryant, and Billy Graham, one which no one else has.  Let me know which you want to hear.”  As my Uncle Ed would say, what’s the point in having a great story about someone if you don’t tell it?

Every golfer will sit up and pay attention when the pastor tells of the time he hit a hole-in-one.  But they’ll love it even more when he tells how he almost hit one.

And they’ll love the reference to reading the Bible through in one year a lot more if you will admit there are some places that put you to sleep and you have to force yourself to slog through them.  (And no, I will not identify such a place in Scripture that does that to me.  I expect it’s different for each of us.)

And they’ll enjoy hearing about your jogging or workout regimen a lot more if you tell how you have to make yourself do it, and then admit that “I don’t enjoy jogging; I enjoy having jogged.”

And if you have a doctorate, preacher…

Try not to wear it too gaudily.  And when telling stories about it, never say “When I was working on my doctorate” or “Back when I was in seminary, working on my masters, not my doctorate.”  That sounds so stuffy, guys.  How about leaving the doctorate out of the discussion unless it’s an integral part.  “I used to have a seminary professor who said…”  Or, “When I was in seminary…”

There is one place on the planet where you will never hear a preacher say, “When I got my doctorate.” And that’s the seminary.  Everybody there has one of those things.  And several have two of them. The President of my seminary–New Orleans Baptist–Dr. Jamie Dew is married to a lady with a doctorate: Dr. Tara Dew.  His predecessor, Dr. Chuck Kelley is also married to a lady with a doctorate, Dr. Rhonda Harrington Kelley.

I seriously doubt whether any of these folks at seminary ever mention “when I got my doctorate.”  (One of my favorite professors, Dr. Ray Frank Robbins, owned two of those things.  Once at a convention, he shared a taxi with two preachers who were chatting about “when I got my doctorate.” Finally, after exhausting the subject, one said to my prof, “So, Ray, where did you get your doctorate?”  The eminent theologian said quietly, “Which one?”)

Best if you let people find out from a third person, or even accidentally, that you are well educated than you being the one to inform them.

Oh, one more thing, preacher.  If you have a doctorate, don’t use it at the front and rear of your name.  You know, like: “Dr. Eminent C. Jones, D. Min.”  One or the other, friend, but not both.

Okay. Enough of this foolishness.

The point is if you can’t make your tiny bit of braggadocio more palatable to the ear, and if you insist on doing it, then go for it.  It’s not that big a deal.

But try not to overdo it.  That stuff gets old real quick.

“Set a guard upon my mouth, O Lord.  Keep watch over the door of my lips.” (Psalm 141:3).

The pastor feels under-appreciated. What to do.

Give honor to whom honor is due.  –Romans 13:7

The elders who rule well are to be considered worthy of double honor, especially those who work hard at preaching and teaching.  –I Timothy 5:17

In my denomination October is “Pastor Appreciation Month.” I suspect most of our churches work at observing it. In social media I see where pastor friends are expressing thanks for being recognized and honored.

It’s good to be appreciated.

But what if you aren’t?

What is a pastor to do when the time of appreciation comes and goes without one word of affirmation from his congregation? The denomination suggested everyone show appreciation to pastors and ministers on staff and the silence was deafening.  The anniversary came and went without any recognition from the church.

Should he take the slight personally?  Should he be offended?  Take it as a sign that he should be looking for his next place of service?

A pastor said to me, “Is it all right if I feel hurt?”

I’m perhaps not the right one to answer this, as my pastorates all did a fair job of showing appreciation when it was called for.  One church celebrated my tenth anniversary with a huge dinner at the city auditorium where the featured guests were people from my past who had influenced me–Sunday School teachers, my college president and his wife, classmates.  Then, they presented my wife and me with all-expense paid tickets to the Holy Land.  (I served only one other church more than ten years and don’t recall what they did. But I’m sure they did something.)

To the pastor who called me feeling under-appreciated, there are three points to be made.  I offer them here humbly.

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What to do when the pastor stirs the pot

“….according to my gospel, for which I suffer hardship even to imprisonment as a criminal….”  (2 Timothy 2:9)

Pot-stirring: To take a stand on a controversial issue.  Known colloquially as “opening a can of worms.”  Rocking the boat. Rubbing the old cat’s fur the wrong way.  Upsetting apple carts.

Expect it.

It’s a poor pastor who doesn’t stir the pot from time to time.

They didn’t crucify Jesus for sweet-talking the 23rd Psalm, for explaining the symbolic meaning of items in the Tabernacle, or for spending six months on the Greek verbs.  He took a stand on what matters most, and when people didn’t like it, He held His ground and paid the ultimate price.

I remind pastors if they’re in this line of work for job security, they might want to think again.  Right after reading Matthew 10, beginning at verse 16.

–Beware of men; for they will deliver you up to their courts, and scourge you in their synagogues

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Perfectionism: The cruel burden we place on each other

“Be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father in Heaven is perfect….” (Matthew 5:48)

First, let’s get the theological argument out of the way.

Let’s make this perfectly clear: God knows you are not perfect and will never be this side of Glory.

And even clearer: “God does not expect sinlessness out of you and me. He is under no illusion about us.”  See Psalm 103:14 “He Himself knows our frame; He is mindful that we are but dust.” And Romans 3:10 “There is none righteous, no, not one.”

Got that?  The illusion of sinless perfection is all ours, my friend.

We read Matthew 5:48 and come away with the erroneous conclusion that God ordered us to be perfect, that perfect means sinlessness, and therefore we can be sinless.  But since we cannot achieve perfection–no one you know has ever pulled it off–then He has given us an impossible standard to live by, one that crushes us and frustrates us and forever disappoints Him.

The result would be that we forever live with a disgusted God and in fear of the celestial woodshed, the destiny of children who bring in failing grades.

Yuck. What kind of theology is this?  And yet, you and I know people who believe this and call themselves Bible students, serious disciples of Jesus, and even evangelists (“sharers of the good news”)..

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What you do best: Be yourself

He Himself knows our frame; He is mindful that we are but dust.  (Psalm 103:14)

Pastor, you have not been called by the Lord to be Abraham or Moses, David or Jeremiah.

And not David Jeremiah, either.

Not Charles Stanley, or Warren Wiersbe.  Not Mark Driscoll, Stephen Furtick, Andy Stanley, or Louie Giglio–and not their clone.

Speaking of Louie, he says, “You are not a reprint or a lithograph. You’re a one-of-a-kind, original creation of God.”

What a marvelous creative inventive (someone get Roget’s Thesaurus down and finish this list!) God we have.  Billions and billions of human beings, no two alike, each one an original! Each one known by Him, and each loved, with a unique place in His divine plan.

Mull on that a while.

God has called you to be you.

God has a place for you, a plan for you, and hope for you.  In order to fill that role and fulfil that purpose in the universe, you must be the “you” He created you to be.  And if you are not, something in the universe is never quite right.

Be yourself. That’s His plan.

It sounds so simple. But that, I submit, is what drives you to distraction.

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Church staffs: Rules to live by

I asked some of my minister friends for their advice concerning church staff relationships.  Here in no particular order are their responses.

1. Jim says, “Be very careful whom you trust completely.”

In over 3 decades of ministry, Jim says he has been brutally betrayed at least 3 times. It has made him wary about trusting anyone with anything confidential.

I’m recalling a time two churches ago when the personnel committee and I were dealing with a sensitive issue, long since forgotten. I said, “Can I say something in here and it not go any further?” The chairman said, “Pastor, I wouldn’t say anything in here you do not want to get out.”

That was a courageous thing for him to do. As subtly as he knew how, the chairman was warning me off from trusting some of the people in that room. In time, I learned he knew whereof he was speaking.

2. Andy says, “First, pastor the staff. Be their shepherd.”

Something inside us wants to protest, that, well, the staff are all ministers and they don’t need pastoring. They do. In fact, preacher, so do you.

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How a preacher can know if he’s lazy

This should be a no-brainer, but apparently, it’s not.

I wrote an article for this website called “Things the Lazy Pastor Doesn’t Know–But is About to Find Out,” and was surprised at the reactions.

Several pastors responded that they’re not really lazy but stressed or pressured or unwell, and so the quality of their work has been suffering lately.

I understand, guys, believe me. Been there, done that. Forty-two years of pastoring six churches, three years on the staff of another, and then five years as the director of missions working with over one hundred churches and their pastors. I know about pastors being under stress, dealing with pressure, and being too sick to perform their duties.

That’s not lazy, my brother. Not even close.

So, at the risk of offending another group of sincerely struggling pastors–the last thing I want to do, believe me–let me try another approach.

Let’s look at it this way: Ten Ways a Pastor Can Know He’s Just Plain Lazy. How’s that? (On Facebook, this would merit a smiley-face.)

1. Procrastination. You cannot bring yourself to do the unpleasant tasks, but keep putting off the hard things.

I’ve read that one of the greatest traits of successful people in the business world is that they tackle the hardest, most unpleasant tasks of the day first. That would take a dedication, a commitment, a focus, which many of us lack.

2. Impatience. You will not do any ministry that is not easy or does not have an immediate payoff.

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The best pastor is a broken man

The best kind of pastor is not one who has always had it all together.

The best shepherd of the Lord’s people is one who knows what it is to go astray and be found, to fall and be picked up, to be wounded and to heal, to sin and be forgiven.

If you have ever sat in a congregation where the pastor is without sin, where his sermons show no indication that he knows what it is to be tempted, and where no allowance is given for the human condition, then you know that is no place for a sinner like you.

As a sinner–one whose heart is a rebel, whose mind strays from the paths of righteousness more often than you would like to admit, who constantly needs to repent and receive God’s mercy–you have no business in a church made up of perfect pastors and sinless members. You stand out like an invalid at a body-building contest.

The best pastor is one who has sinned and been taken to the Lord’s woodshed for a time of discipline and chastisement. He will know how to warn the children from straying and to bind them up in love after they have learned life’s lessons the hard way.

The best pastor is one who has been in trouble and doubted and came close to slipping, but at the last minute was rescued by the hand of God. He will value the Lord’s mercy.

The best pastor is probably not the kind your pastor-search-committee is looking for. But it should be.

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