Tom Lester played “Eb” on the wonderful old “Green Acres” television series. He’s semi-retired now and living on his family farm in Laurel, Mississippi. Tuesday, Tom and I were on the program together at the First Baptist Church of Covington’s annual senior adult thing, and over lunch he told me this story about another star of “Green Acres,” Arnold the pig.

“Pigs are smart,” he said, “but not like dogs. A dog can learn all sorts of tricks because they want to please you. But a pig is like a cat. It’s selfish. It thinks only of itself. So, people who work with pigs in movies and television have figured out that the way to get them to obey you is with food. First, they let them get hungry, and only then can they get them to obey.”

“But,” he continued, “as soon as the pig gets his belly full, he’s not good for anything the rest of the day. So, they bring in another pig that looks like the first one and use him.” At any given time, Arnold was a half-dozen pigs.

We laughed about that, thinking how like humans pigs are. We see it in church a lot. People go to this church or that one because, “I get fed there.” Not: “I can serve the Lord there.” And how many times have we heard people remark about a sermon that “I didn’t get fed.”

It would be funny if it weren’t so sad.

I found this in my notes from a Wednesday pastors meeting some weeks ago. We were talking about positive leadership in our congregations and communities.

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I was a sophomore in college when God began doing a special work in my life. I joined West End Baptist Church in Birmingham and jumped into all the activities I could work into my schedule. That’s when the minister of education made a false assumption about me.

Ron Palmer stopped me in a church hallway one day and said, “I’d like you to give your tithing testimony in church.” I said, “What is that?” He said, “Tell us your story, why you tithe your income to the Lord through the church.” I said, “What is this word ‘tithe’?” I could not remember ever hearing it before.

Ron explained that to tithe is to give one dollar out of every ten to the Lord through our church. I said, “Well, in that case, I can’t tell my story because I don’t do that.” At the time, I had almost no income–I worked Saturdays selling men’s clothing at the National Shirt Shop downtown. What little giving I did in church was infrequent and miniscule.

It was several years before I started tithing, and even then I struggled with it for the next decade. Part of the struggle was just doing it–when you’re in seminary or getting started in those early poor-paying pastorates, every bill that arrives in the mail is a challenge–and the other part was coming to terms with the doctrine itself. Is this something God expects of us? Where is this taught in the Bible? Since most all the references are Old Testament, wasn’t that Jewish and not Christian?

Recently on my website I reported talks given by two ministers to a small group of pastors and seminary students in which both happened to mention tithing. One church is in Texas and the other Georgia, but both require their teachers and staffers to tithe. One speaker had said his accountant does the tax returns of 600 ministers and had found that only one-fourth of them were tithers. The pastor had concluded a lot of ministers are not living up to what they preach.

In the “comments” section of our website, where readers can register their opinions and reactions to articles, one fellow exploded in anger, accusing me of hypocrisy of the worst sort. When I tried to respond, I found that his website was all about promoting his book against tithing and that his computer blocked my message. I also discovered some of my friends wanted to weigh in on the subject of tithing.

That’s the purpose of this little article. At the end, you are invited to tell us why you tithe or why you don’t. Disagreements and differences are welcome. Just be respectful.

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This is Bill Taylor’s brain child. Officially retired from Lifeway Christian Resources as their senior educational consultant–Southern Baptists’ Mr. Sunday School–Bill now works for the North American Mission Board as a “senior strategist.” On numerous occasions he has spent several days in our part of the world and with churches on the Mississippi Gulf Coast, looking for a key way to make a difference.

Out of that search came “Unlimited Partnerships.” Bill began to imagine a plan by which we could match a gifted and dedicated seminary student with one of our local needy churches to serve a year or more in the area of education and evangelism. He imagined large churches in the SBC led by consecrated pastors who would want to pay the salaries of these students. Then, he set out to make it happen.

“We couldn’t have done it without David Hankins,” Bill Taylor said, referring to the executive of Louisiana Baptists. “When he first heard of this, he told me, ‘Bill, this is the right thing to do. Even if you can’t find the sponsoring churches, we will back it.'” But it wasn’t necessary. “It wasn’t a matter of dollars,” Bill explained. “This was all about matching up enterprising students with responsive churches and successful sponsors who could teach them and mentor them.”

The program kicked off March 1, with 7 students working out of 7 of our churches. This is the pilot program, a test run by which we find out what works and what doesn’t. We’re finding our way.

For the record, here are the seven churches.

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The West St. Charles Baptist Church of Boutte would argue that they’re not in New Orleans. Strictly speaking, they’re 20 miles or so west of the city, located on U.S. 90 in the middle of a growing segment of suburbia. But everything about the communities of Boutte, Lakewood, and Luling depends on their proximity to New Orleans, so we’ll not split hairs.

I preached for them Sunday morning, emphasizing two points the Lord has laid on my heart to carry to our churches these days: the role and responsibility of pastors from Acts 20:28 and the responsibility of church members from Hebrews 13:17. Since WSCBC is pastorless, this is a good time to try to affect their philosophy on these matters.

In the late 1970s–in the days of the oil boom down here–this church was regularly featured by the denomination as one of our fastest growing churches in America. The oil bust came along in the mid-80s and people moved out, then the church went through a succession of pastors and these days, they struggle to hit 100. But they are a wonderful group of folks and situated to have an incredible ministry, if…. If they get the right pastor and if they support him.

We will appreciate your prayers for West St. Charles Baptist Church.

The First Baptist Church of Westwego is located a half dozen blocks north of U.S. 90 some 15 miles back toward New Orleans. Jay Adkins has been their pastor for the last half dozen years, and it seems to me the church is doing very well. The last time I worshiped with them, their sanctuary was gutted out, boxes of supplies to be distributed in the community lined one wall, and you could see the sunlight shining through the blue tarp overhead. But no more.

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I used to not have time to read the paper before heading to Sunday School and church, but these days, with a job that sends me to churches all over the five-parish area to preach or to visit, the schedule often allows for leisurely mornings with the paper. Today, I’m preaching at West St. Charles Baptist Church at Boutte at 10:45 am. I recommend these quiet mornings.

Why we read obituaries.

Now, my mama reads the obituaries in her Daily Mountain Eagle to see if she knows the people who died, and as a nearly 91-year-old native of Walker County, Alabama, she frequently does. We pastors read them to make certain we stay current with deaths in our extended church family. But there’s another reason: many are just interesting.

Here is the opening sentence in an obituary in today’s paper: “Helen (Pearlie) Marie Falcon Gallagher of New Orleans, LA, completed the long goodbye on March 14, 2007, at the age of 85 in Tulsa, OK, her city of residence since September 2005.” That being the date of the evacuation from Katrina. “Completed the long goodbye.” Fascinating. Wonder what they meant.

The article goes on to identify her as a “WW II Navy wife” and “family keeper of written memories.” Every clan needs such a keeper; I hope yours has one.

Most of the obits are fairly vanilla, but occasionally gleams of gold shine through. John Cosmo Centanni was 80 when he died on March 14, and as a Marine in World War II received the Purple Heart for his service on Iwo Jima. Best I can figure out, he would have been 18 years old at the time of that battle. Not doubting the report, just noting it. Toward the end of the obit is this: “He was very generous and loving. He loved his wife and children more than anything in the world. His larger than life personality touched many people. He loved life. We will miss his love every day that goes by. Daddy, you did it your way.”

Saturday, I was entering Home Depot at the same time an elderly gentleman came in pushing a cart. He was really dressed up–sports coat, white shirt, tie, etc. I said, “Sir, you are one of the few people who know the right way to dress when you come to Home Depot!” He smiled and said, “I just came from the funeral parlor.” I said, “Oh. God bless you, sir.”

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First the story, then a few observations.

A Methodist minister goes to the door and finds a stranger standing there. “Sir,” the man said, “I’m new in town and need a preacher for a funeral.” The Methodist minister invites him in, and the man continues, “The funeral is for my little dog that died yesterday.”

The minister said, “Well, you know we don’t really do funerals for animals. Why don’t you just bury him and say a few words yourself?” The man said, “This dog was like a member of our family. We’re heartbroken over its death, and well, we just wanted to give him a good send-off.”

“I’m not going to be able to help you,” the minister said, “but the Baptist pastor lives three doors down the street. You might ask him.” The man thanked him and as he was turning away, he said, “Oh, by the way, Reverend, what would be an appropriate amount to give the minister for the funeral? I was thinking of five thousand dollars.”

“Come back in the house,” the minister said. “Why didn’t you tell me that dog was a Methodist?”

One of our pastors told that story last Wednesday at our weekly pastors’ gathering. It went over big, leading me to believe that it was new to many. Either that, or they were just enjoying an old friend again.

Over the years, inflation has messed with that story. The first time I heard it, the amount was fifty dollars. It takes more to catch our fancy than it used to, I suppose. If there are forensic humorists out there, someone could probably track the origins of that joke down and discover that originally the amount was five dollars or something.

Some stories take on lives of their own and seem to live forever. And with the internet, no doubt my great-grandchildren will some day hear that joke–by then, the figure will be five million!–and pass it on to their friends.

What you wonder is why Readers Digest keeps printing new jokes. Since each new generation has not heard the stories of the previous one, they could recycle every story every decade or two and get by with it.

A good story is like a good song: it bears repetition and each performer gives it his own rendering.

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Fifty feet from the 17th Street Canal–the one which burst on August 29, 2005, drowning much of the Lakeview section of New Orleans–sits Pontchartrain Baptist Church. The new Pontchartrain Baptist Church, if you will.

Previously, it was a small red-brick sanctuary fronting Robert E. Lee Boulevard with a two-story white-block educational building down the side. Over 40 years ago, as a young seminarian I taught the couples’ Sunday School class in an upstairs room and led the worship inside the sanctuary. My classmate Vaughan Pruitt was the pastor. When the canal’s levee broke, the water cascaded across the street and destroyed most everything in its path.

The educational building has been torn down. Pastor Jerry Smith says it’s not particularly because of the storm damage, but the result of the shifting foundation. “It was built in the days when pilings were not required, and was beginning to tilt.”

A church in Jackson, Mississippi, has adopted Pontchartrain Church and its members have worked hard to bring the building back to speed. The latest thing they did was to paint the outside. It’s no longer a red brick building; now it’s white brick. And beautiful, if I may say so.

The sanctuary building is all that remains for nearly a block in every direction. Houses on all sides have been demolished, and the vacant lots surrounding the church have left it isolated like an island.

The new sign in front of the church announces: “REDEDICATION, April 1, 10:00 am. You’re invited.”

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Metairie Baptist Church is in an unusual situation these days. First, this wonderful old traditional church in the heart of what we call “old Metairie” (translation: old money) has as its pastor seminary professor Dr. Thomas Strong. The church called Bob Cole to handle weekday pastoral functions so Thomas can continue serving at both places.

And secondly, they’re going through some significant changes. Thomas is leading the church in a FAITH evangelistic ministry. Recently, he told me, “We have 42 people participating in FAITH this semester. On a recent Sunday we did door to door visitation. I’ve discovered that despite what people may say, door-to-door visiting is not a thing of the past. In the process of the day, we had the opportunity to knock on 96 doors and talked to about half of them (42, I think). We were doing an opinion poll that would lead to the gospel presentation. We shared the gospel with seven people! That is a huge praise.”

“Also,” Thomas said, “we offered the ministry at Metairie Baptist Church to the other 36 homes we visited. This now happens on a regular basis as the church is getting turned on to telling others. I am so thankful to see what God is doing by empowering the church for mission through FAITH.”

MBC is hosting our NAMB chaplain Joe Williams in a “Coping with Loss” conference, and their women’s ministry is flourishing under Terry Dickson (who heads the associational women’s ministry).

These are significant changes for this church. “Only God could do these things at MBC,” Thomas said and added, “I am rejoicing daily that he has let me be a part of it.”

Second Church: First Baptist Church of Avondale on the West Bank.

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“Thirteen years ago, this friend turned me down,” Freddie Arnold told the pastors at Wednesday’s meeting. “I was trying to recondition an old school bus for mission trips and I felt led to ask a certain member of my church to pay for it. He wasn’t able to–in spite of my knowing for certain the Lord led me to ask him–and nothing was ever done. We finally sold the old bus. That friend called this week.”

“He said, ‘I couldn’t help you 13 years ago, but the Lord has not let me alone about that.'” He knew Freddie is deeply involved in the rebuilding of this city, so informed him he is sending a sizeable check for the work here. Freddie said, “That will allow us to update our disaster relief van and buy some additional equipment.”

“I have an announcement for some of you pastors,” Freddie said. “The salary supplements several of you have been receiving are being phased out as of June 1. They will be reassessed at that time.”

Apparently–and we have no argument with this–our state leadership has decided that after over 18 months of post-Katrina existence, our pastors should be on their feet. Either their church should be back to the point of supporting them, they should have a job on the side to supplement their church income, or they should be thinking of moving on to a pastorate outside this hurricane area.

Freddie announced that Lifeway Christian Resources had sent us preschool and children’s books for a new church library. “See me,” he said to the pastor who was quick to volunteer that his church was in the process of creating a new library.

Speaking of Lifeway, John Moore was with us. John served for 30 years in student ministry with the Louisiana Baptist Convention before moving “to the dark side,” as he jokingly put it, meaning the denominational headquarters in Nashville. “I want you to know that Lifeway is partnering with you,” he said. “We have sent $1.5 million in non-Cooperative Program funds to the Louisiana Baptist Convention for disaster relief work. We sent $750,000 to the seminary. And we’re putting money into the Unlimited Partnerships.”

“Furthermore,” John said, “Bruce Raley of Lifeway is working to bring religious education people to staff your Ridgecrest-on-the-River conference this September. The ministers of education will be available at no cost for workshops in your churches, too. Bruce says these guys are hearing about this and calling to say, ‘Sign me up for New Orleans.'”

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Some months ago, we reported here that the city had blown it again, that City Hall had awarded the trash contract for the French Quarter to a company with no trucks and no history of this kind of work. A few weeks before the work was to begin, they still had no trucks and no personnel. You could predict how this was going to turn out.

We were all wrong. The company called SDT has the most gorgeous shiny black garbage trucks you’ve ever seen (I predict Hummer owners will soon be trading up for one!) and employees who take a great deal of pride in what they’re doing. I think we’ve reported previously an account of the supervisor following the truck through the Quarter in her car, making sure no motorist pulls around the truck–lots of sanitation workers get killed that way–and seeing that every scrap of paper is picked up and the garbage cans replaced neatly.

Wednesday morning, someone wrote to the editor of following an SDT truck through the Quarter and seeing the driver stop, get out and pick up a single cup someone had tossed in the street, then driving on. Alan Petro said, “I just want to say thank you, SDT. You are doing an incredible job.”

It’s so inspiring to see people do their work well.

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