Category Archives: Pastors

“This is not about you, pastor.” What that means.

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“We do not preach ourselves, but Christ Jesus as Lord, and ourselves your servants for Jesus’ sake” (2 Corinthians 4:5).

The expression “This is not about you, pastor” is not something you and I need to ever say to another human being. Rather, it is something a minister should say to himself frequently.

Think of it as a mental adjustment, a refocusing.

It’s easy to think it is about me.  The search committee wants a preacher with impressive credentials, a glowing record of accomplisments in previous churches, and strong abilities.  Good teeth and a pretty wife will help.

The congregation welcomes you, applauds, “pounds” you (ask any preacher), and compliments you.  They pay you fairly well, and when the church does well, they brag on you. When it does poorly, they blame you.

It’s easy to conclude it’s all about me.

And that would be wrong.

Bad wrong.

Let’s talk about it….

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You asked about praying in Jesus’ name in public

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“Whatever you ask in My name, that will I do, that the Father may be glorified in the Son” (John 14:13).

“…that whatever you ask of the Father in My name, He may give it to you” (John 15:16).

“Pastor, would you lead our city council in prayer for our opening session next Tuesday? We would really appreciate it. Oh, and, I hope you won’t mind–but please keep it inclusive. Thank you.”

Ever get one of those invitations?

What to do.

Marilou is a friend of my cousin in another state, and she was facing a difficult situation. So, cousin Mary Elizabeth invited her to run this one by cousin Joe. .

“I’ve been invited to bring the invocation at this public gathering and I know they would rather I not mention Jesus’ name in my prayer.” She is a serious believer and wants to be faithful to the Lord.

She assured me that no one had actually warned her off the Lord’s name by using that little joke they call “making your prayer inclusive.”

She was free to do whatever she pleased. The thing she was trying to settle in her mind was “what exactly did she please?”  Are Christians duty-bound to pray always in Jesus’ name?  Or, is it all right not to use the actual words?

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How the preacher can do weddings he’ll not regret

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My first wedding didn’t turn out too well.  My sister and the fellow she chose for her life-mate asked me to marry them.  I was ordained and trying to pastor a tiny church outside Birmingham, but other than that, was as green as it’s possible to get. I bought a Pastor’s Manual (yep, they make those things) and in someone’s living room, as I recall, read every word of the ceremony.

I sometimes wondered if the fact that the marriage didn’t last had anything to do with the fact that I didn’t know what I was doing.

Sometime–when we both have the time–I’ll tell you some of my wedding stories. I have quite a few, some embarrassing to me (like calling the groom by the best man’s name) and some embarrassing to the participants (like the time the bride fainted), and some just funny.

I have done hundreds of weddings in almost every conceivable situation–sanctuaries, college chapels, parks, living rooms, and back yard patios–and so have learned a few lessons on how to do this right. (And twice that many on how to get it wrong!)

Here are my pointers. Use any that work for you, and ignore the rest.

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13 things to do when your church is hurting financially

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“My God shall supply all your needs according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:19).

A lot of things can happen when a church experiences a money crunch, most of them bad.

The finance committee can get upset, deacons can get angry, church members become scared, and staff members start honing their resumes and looking for a safe place to jump.  Nothing about this is good.

Can anything good come from a financial crisis? It depends on how you handle it. Read on.

Keep in mind that sometimes a financial crunch results from a too-aggressive program outstripping the resources. Perhaps the church has become too-invested in a project and the crisis sounds a wakeup call.

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20 practical tips for preachers about funerals

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During seminary, my pastorate of 30 months experienced one death in the congregation. The husband of the deceased lady said, “Pastor, do you know where there is a cemetery around here?”  (We were in the bayou country southwest of New Orleans.) I told him, “I’ll find out.”

I called the pastor of the larger First Baptist Church of Luling, a few miles away.  Don Grafton said, “Joe, I’ve been here 11 years and haven’t had the first funeral.”

He had no idea how to find the nearest cemetery.

That is the exception, believe me. Six years later, when I became pastor of the First Baptist Church of Columbus, Mississippi, if I remember correctly, we had seven funerals the first week or two.  It was like people had “saved up” their dying until the new pastor was on the field.

I’ve buried them of all ages and situations.  Once I did a double funeral for a 34-year-old man and his 64-year-old grandfather. Do the math real quick.  How is this possible?

The grandfather had died ten years earlier and no funeral had ever been held. They interred his ashes inside the grandson’s casket. (The 34-year-old had been killed with an axe and stored in the family’s freezer. Police arrested his wife’s lesbian lover. Both women are serving life terms in our state penitentiary.)

The hardest funerals are for precious little children.  Second most heart-breaking are for mothers who died giving birth.  Next are the young fathers who leave behind a stunned and grieving family.

Nothing about this is fun.  It all tears your heart out and shakes you to your core.

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The three days each week the pastor should turn off his computer

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(This is for pastors on the subject of sermon preparation.)

The most vulnerable time for any sermon is in the couple of days prior to its delivery.

At those times, the pastor does not need to be getting criticism or additional input from helpers (like myself!) or further ideas from deep study.  This is when he needs to be putting the finishing touches on his message and getting it ready for delivery.

The first part of the week….

Early in the week–unless the pastor is such a rarity that almost none of this applies to him–he should have nailed down his subject and text for Sunday’s sermon. He should know the “one big idea” the Lord wants communicated. And he should have a general idea where he’s going with this sermon.

How did he get to this point?  By staying in the word day in and day out, and mapping out sermon ideas weeks in advance.  This way, he has known for at least a couple of weeks that next Sunday he would be preaching from this text on that subject.  This is not something he “thunk up” at the last minute. The message has been marinating over these days.

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The pastor’s biggest temptation

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“Shepherd the flock of God among you…not for sordid gain, but with eagerness….” (I Peter 5:2).


“Will a man rob God?” (Malachi 3:8).   Of course, it happens all the time. For most, it happens when they keep for themselves God’s tithes and offerings. However, every year hundreds of pastors go to jail for embezzling God’s money from their churches.

How does this happen? How could a God-called pastor fleece God’s sheep?

Aside from the spiritual considerations, two large things keep me from stealing millions from my church: 1) I would not know how, or even where to begin, and 2) my church has structures in place to safeguard the Lord’s money. (My pastor will read this and think, “I can tell you another: We don’t have millions of dollars!” True enough. But that’s not the point. Smiley-face goes here.)

So how do people manage to pull off such grand thefts of God’s money?

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What one new pastor told his church

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“(I ask) that they may all be one, even as Thou, Father, art in me, and I in Thee, that they also may be in us, that the world may believe that Thou didst send me” (John 17:21).

No one wants your church to be unified more than the Lord.

In fact, almost everything depends on unity.

On April 14, 2012, the new pastor, Dr. Charles McLain, stood before his congregation, ready to lead his first monthly business session.

Before they got underway with reports and motions and votes, however, Charles had something to say which they needed to hear.  His little speech would affect the course of that church for years to come.

They needed to know how their business meetings were going to be conducted.

What follows is his written message, verbatim.  (He shared it with us, alongwith permission to share.)

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The pastor’s number one resource. It might surprise you.

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“As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another” (Proverbs 27:17).

The greatest resource for anyone in the ministry–other than the obvious Resource of the Holy Spirit Himself, of course–is not the internet, not one’s seminary, and not the public library.  It’s not your denomination, and for those of us in the SBC, it’s not Lifeway Christian Resources.

Those are all good, and we recommend them highly. But they’re not the nearest and most reliable source of help for pastors.

It’s your brother.

The pastors in your area–shepherds of the Lord’s flocks just as you are–do the same work as you, struggle with the same issues, wrestle with the same temptations and enjoy the same rewards. You have more in common with the pastors in your town than with anyone else on the face of the earth.

And yet.

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Seven things the pastor cannot do from the pulpit

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“…so that you may know how you ought to conduct yourself in the house of God, which is the church of the living God….” (I Timothy 3:15).

You can’t chew gum in the pulpit, smoke a cigarette, or bring your coffee in with you. You can’t preach in your pajamas or lead a worship service in your swimsuit.

But you knew that.

However, some pastors do things every bit as silly as this, and as counter-productive, we must say.

Now, in one sense, a pastor can do anything from the pulpit.  Once.

But we’re talking about things no right-thinking godly pastor should attempt to do from the Lord’s sacred place of leadership in His church.

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